There is a statement on the FAQ’s page of this site that acknowledges that over the course of a thirty year career it is virtually impossible to remember what concepts are original and what concepts I have picked up from other sources along the way. I believe the majority of them are original, or at least my original spin. But when I know something is not, I want to be sure to point it out and give credit where it is due if I can.

This is one of those times. I know without a doubt I stole this from someone. I remember reading it on a website years ago and thinking to myself, “This is good. I am so stealing this,” and I have been using it ever since. I have no idea who the author was.

The Eight Essentials is the best short list of the most important components of a healthy life. They are:

  • Nutrition
  • Hydration
  • Sleep
  • Exercise
  • Time in Nature
  • Spiritual Practice
  • Physical Touch
  • Relationship with Others

Clients often report that “I don’t feel well”, “I feel sluggish”, “I have no motivation”, “I don’t know what’s wrong with me”, “I don’t know where to start”, “I can’t get my shit together”, “I had a crappy week”, “my symptoms are worse”, “my meds aren’t working”.

In each of these scenarios we walk through an in-depth examination of each of the Eight Essentials.

  • Nutrition – if you are eating crap you will feel like crap; excess carbs mess with your blood sugar; sugar and gluten increase inflammation and pain; alcohol is a depressant; caffeine can trigger anxiety; Serotonin, your happy hormone, is manufactured in your gut not your brain; if you are not taking care of your gut the negative ripple effects can be serious; any improvement is good; best case scenario is 30 days of a detox plan like paleo or Whole 30 or even Keto to reset your system.
  • Hydration – if you aren’t willing to change anything else on the list at least drink eight glasses of water a day and sleep eight hours a night; the human body is 60%+ water and if you allow it to dry up it simply will cease to work; your blood will actually thicken, flow through your veins like sludge and not get the necessary oxygen to your brain. Not to mention adequate hydration will help you poop and everyone knows a good poop makes you feel better.
  • Sleep – again, if you aren’t willing to change anything else on the list at least get eight hours of sleep a night and drink eight glasses of water a day; sleep is when our body repairs itself on a cellular level and when we process our subconscious emotions; it is a necessary reset to put the previous day “to bed” if you will and prepare for the next; sleep deeply impacts mood for better or worse.
  • Exercise – it combats sedentariness which is a contributor to depression; it gets your blood oxygenated and pumping sending good stuff throughout your body and taking away toxins; it lifts your mood; so many people say they will exercise when they feel more energetic but it doesn’t work that way; activity creates energy; you have to force yourself get active to start the cycle, then it will take care of itself.
  • Time in Nature – put down your device and leave the toxic box you live in; go outside; I don’t care if it’s just to sit on your porch; breathe real air and let the sun touch your skin; even if you take Vitamin D supplements (and I support that) the most important kind of Vitamin D can only be made in your body from sun exposure; all it takes is fifteen minutes a day; and if you’re feeling really adventurous, take a walk, preferably in the woods or on a greenway; I’m not trying to be a smartass, but it’s such a simple thing, going outside; yet so few of us do it on a regular basis.
  • Spiritual Practice – I’m not going all God and religion on you here; but it is a fact that to believe that there is something, anything, out there greater than you boosts your mental well-being; I had a client once who started AA and had a really hard time with the whole ‘higher power’ thing; I asked him if there was anything that he thought of as great, powerful, magical and awe inspiring; he said “Yeah, there’s this enormous old oak tree in my backyard. It’s pretty incredible”; I said “Well, there you go. Use that”. And he did. And it worked for him; humans are just entirely too flawed to be the very last thing at the very top of the food chain; there has to be something else; pick what works for you and ponder it every day.
  • Physical Touch – sexual intimacy can be part of this but it’s not the focus; what we’re talking about here is the importance of hugs; of a hand on your arm during a sincere conversation; of snuggling with your kids while reading a bedtime story; fist bumps and shoulder nudges amongst friends; touching toes while you’re on opposite ends of the couch reading; even cuddling with your dog or cat; we need something alive to touch and hold and to return the favor; our ability to survive and thrive depends on it; just ask Harlow’s monkeys.
  • Relationship with Others – no man, or woman, or non-binary person is an island; we are an interdependent species and we absolutely need each other for survival; some have greater needs than others – introverts and extroverts are real; but no one can remain mentally stable for long without some connection to other people; it doesn’t have to be an intimate relationship; nor does it have to be your biological family; we need it so badly that we will foster it with strangers – people watch for awhile and see what happens in long grocery store lines, at barbershops, in bars or on mass transit; the people who don’t have it in other areas of their lives will try to get it from strangers in public; think about that the next time the little old lady behind you wants to chat about her cat; be generous and patient because it might benefit you as well.

Other than a trip to the grocery store to improve your nutrition, these Eight Essentials cost you absolutely nothing except some time and effort. We are a society quick to want a magic prescription, a great vacation, some expensive retail therapy, a complicated bullet journal or a luxurious massage to make ourselves feel better or get our life in order. We think nothing of putting more energy into complaining about feeling bad than we are willing to put into doing 8 simple things that will make us feel better. There is something seriously backwards about that.

Next time you feel “off”, take a moment to run down this list of essential components of a happy, healthy life and see what you can tweak in order to get back to your best self.